Posts Tagged ‘BDSM’

Met a cool trans guy named Aiden* through Fetlife; we’re going on a date the week after next if he can find the time. I actually like him a LOT– he’s like a cross between me and my best friend but even quirkier, which I didn’t think was possible but is quite a plus. I had a jealousy attack when I offered to show him pictures of me and the Boyfriend, and he said he had already found him on his own. But I guess that expresses interest, right?

*All names are changed to protect the guilty.

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Posted: July 25, 2012 in kink
Tags: , ,

I tried reading 50 Shades of Grey and got bored two chapters in. I will not be finishing it; I will not be writing a review. If you like erotic literature, try reading something that doesn’t suck.

Why “Puppy”?

Posted: July 24, 2012 in kink
Tags: , , , , ,
English: MissIsibella, portrait

English: MissIsibella, portrait (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Obviously, I’m not actually a typing, kinky dog. But I do play one on TV.

Early on in our relationship, Boyfriend came home from work and I immediately jumped on him in excitement. He chuckled, patted my head, and from then on I was his puppy.

If you’re unfamiliar with puppy play, I’d like to make it clear that it’s not about bestiality. It’s not the idea of me being a dog that turns us on; it’s the dynamic. He is my Master, and, like a puppy, I get played with, petted, spoiled, collared, pampered– and when necessary, punished.

It works out great for me, because when I get into subspace, I naturally roll myself into a tiny, submissive ball, perfect for leashes and tummy rubs.

Also, I make a good pair with anybody dressed as a kitten…

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(This is based on a discussion I saw on Tumblr.)

Being transgender can put you in really unique, but often sticky, situations, because of your relationship with your own body. Many of us are really sensitive about the gendered characteristics of our bodies (like our genitals, chests, hips, etc), and this can pose a challenge to a partner who wants to, or was planning on, being able to touch and talk about those places. Obviously this is an important topic for transgender people and their partners to discuss: What is it okay for me to touch, and in what way? What is it okay for me to say and talk about? What activities are you comfortable with?

But what if you’re transgender and kinky? What if you’re transgender and a submissive, like me? I am constantly torn between my desire to give myself to Boyfriend completely, but that’s very hard when I constantly have to call “yellow” to remind him my chest is off-limits today. He makes an effort to make me feel masculine all the time, especially during sexual activity, but sometimes my dysphoria still gets the best of me. Obviously I don’t yet have a conclusive solution.

If you are dealing with this, how do you handle it?

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I know this because I’m a blogging addict. While we’re here, we may as well get some things out of the way, because as I said, I have a lot of adjectives.

What is polyamory?

Polyamory is the opposite of monogamy, which is in our culture the “default” system of two partners being emotionally and sexually involved only with each other. Polyamorous people, on the other hand, have multiple partners at once, with all partners consenting to this arrangement (meaning it’s not cheating). There are many ways to be polyamorous.

My boyfriend and I are in an open relationship, meaning we are each other’s primary partners, but we also branch out into other, slightly less committed relationships.

What does it mean to be kinky?

Kinky people engage or are interested in fetishes and BDSM (bondage, discipline, dominance, submission, sadism, and/or masochism). I am mainly a submissive, but sometimes like to try some sadism or dominance.

What the hell is pansexual?

While most people might describe me as bisexual, I prefer the term “pansexual,” meaning I have attractions to people of all genders (yes, there are more than two).

What does it mean to be transgender?

Transgender people feel a divide between the sex that they were assigned at birth, and the gender they feel themselves to be. So while everyone has thought of me my entire life as a girl, I am actually a guy. Please respect this and use only masculine words with me (he, him, his, guy, etc).

So what are you doing here?

People like me who engage in nontraditional sexual and gender behavior often get the short end of the stick, and can be reduced to feeling very alone and depressed. In addition to helping myself talk about and deal with some issues that may arise, I aim to help other people feel less lonely when they’re dealing with these issues.

Please, ask me anything in the comments, and I will make a post about it!