How To Use OKCupid to Find Partners in an Open Relationship

Posted: July 24, 2012 in polyamory
Tags: , , , , , , , ,
Image representing OkCupid as depicted in Crun...

Image via CrunchBase

Wanna hear something cute? The Boyfriend and I met on OKCupid, and decided to take our relationship to the meatsphere once we figured out that he lived two doors down from my best friend in the dorms. Another of my partners was a friend who found out I was kinky and available when she stumbled across my profile on the site.

While this is not my preferred method for finding partners (I’ll explain in a subsequent post), it’s relatively reliable and often where people begin looking.

Here are my tips for OKC success:

  • Put up a good picture. This is a basic ingredient for success, because people trust you more when they can see your eyes (and they learn right off the bat that they’re attracted to you!).
  • Be honest. This is the second basic ingredient that every OKCupid profile needs, whether you’re poly or not.
  • List yourself as “available.” Many people will immediately rule you out for dating if you list yourself as “seeing someone” or “married,” because they assume you are cheating on a spouse or partner. I don’t blame them.
  • Somewhere in the beginning of your profile, mention that you are in an open/poly relationship (or whatever your preferred term is) so that monogamous people don’t end up being “led along.”
  • Get your partner(s) to make profiles too, and mention their usernames along with your relationship description, reminding people that they can go check out their pages as well. In my opinion, this spirit of family and camaraderie is an important thing to see for someone who might join you. It proves that you’re not just cheating on a partner, but that you engage in a positive and healthy lifestyle that benefits everyone involved.

Good luck! If you have any more tips (or need advice) leave me a comment and I’l get back to you ASAP!

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  1. […] How To Use OKCupid to Find Partners in an Open Relationship […]

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